Anything that becomes a “thing,” such as cougar dating has become over the last ten-odd years, is bound to develop its own surrounding mythology. Very often, these untrue myths only hurt the people involved, both the younger men who enjoy dating older women and the cougars who prefer their men a bit younger. Today, it is our mission to dispel the 6 most common myths about cougar dating.
1. Cougars Are Predators
There is this picture of cougars in the minds of many members of the general public where they are these unstoppable predators who spend every waking hour trying to figure out a way to hunt down yet another young man. Cougars are supposed to be these almost mindless beasts with only one thing on their mind, incapable of real emotions or anything resembling a normal dating life.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Cougars are ordinary women (in the good sense of the word) who lead ordinary lives, with ordinary goals and ordinary dreams. They are just more open to certain experiences than other women. Moreover, they are usually not the ones who approach men. It is the younger men who approach them.
2. Their Social Circles Are Incompatible
There is this commonly-held belief that a cougar and her younger new friend are never able to enjoy the perfect melding of the two social circles. This is pure nonsense. For one, there are always problems in bringing two social circles together, regardless of the age.
Moreover, if someone is unable to accept this kind of a relationship and especially if they cannot stop making snide comments, maybe they should not be in your social circle to begin with, right? Humans are social animals and it does not matter how old someone is.
3. The Younger Man Will Inevitably Cheat
In order to understand how untrue this very popular cougar dating myth really is, we need to think long and hard about infidelity as a concept. Infidelity has nothing to do with the couple’s age, their social status or even how attracted they are to each other. Infidelity is a matter of respect, or more precisely the lack of it.
And as we all know, respect has nothing to do with age. When a younger man cheats on his older cougar lover, the age is never the real reason. The younger man cheats because he cheats. He would cheat on a woman his age just the same.
4. Someone Will Get Bored
If you ask the people who have qualms about cougar dating what the problem is, they will often tell you that such relationships are doomed because someone is bound to get bored. It will either be the man who will start desiring younger women or it will be the woman who will grow tired of her young friend’s fleeting interests and supposed shallowness.
This is in no way inevitable. The fact that the man is younger does not mean he cannot grow more sophisticated and develop an interest in his lady friend’s passions. There is also no reason to think that a young man will stop feeling attracted to his older partner. Cougar relationships are the same as any other kind, only with a more pronounced age difference.
5. Families Do Not Accept Such Relationships
There is also this myth that the families of either person in the cougar relationship are unable to accept these relationships. The cougar’s children are supposed to forever hate the new young partner and the man’s family is supposed to see the cougar as an enemy, a cradle snatcher.
Once again, this is a myth that has nothing to do with reality. Our families want what’s best for us and if they see that this other person is making us happier, they will accept them no matter what. The only true myth is that love conquers all. It really does.
6. It’s All A Big Fetish
A myth that is more than just a myth, a vicious and ill-meaning lie, in fact, is that the whole cougar thing is nothing more than a fetish on both sides – a horny young man who thinks an older woman is some sexual holy grail and a bored older woman who sees younger men as trophies.
Cougar dating is about having fun, meeting new people, discovering new passions and falling in love. Just like any other type of dating.